(The predecessor to this post can be found here: Why do we think negatively?)
I’ve been determined to halt some negative thoughts I realise have recurred over and over for a long time. They’re thoughts everyone has, but unfortunately that doesn’t help to make having them any less painful! When I think about those thoughts, I’m also reminded how much time I have spent with them. Wasted time, going backwards. I’d much rather be happy, hence my amazement that it’s so much easier to be negative. Why brain, why?
At first it started with crying: I know crying isn’t very fun but for me it was a step in the right direction. Being positive doesn’t necessarily mean 100% sunshine from here on out. For me it’s more about knowing how to deal with a situation in a way that you won’t regret. Keep moving on.
So there I am crying about things that happened recently and things that happened more than a year ago. Then when I was ready I chose happiness, and threw myself into it. I focused a lot on reading and was going through books and blog posts at lightning speed. When I needed to slow down I’d rewatch some of my favourite programmes, rekindling those old connections with fictional characters I’m too attached to. At night if I go out I laugh with friends and if I’m at home I dance to whatever music makes me want to. When I’m alone I think of how lovely my friends are; how extremely lucky that along the way I’ve met the beautiful people that stand by me now. But didn’t I think I was a horrible person devoid of use to anyone? Well, I must have done something right along the way.
And suddenly everything I have has become enough. My time is full of movement, because I can fill myself with love.